Time has been marching along. Sorry I haven't posted, but I really haven't had much to say. This has always been an infertility blog for me, so posting pregnancy related news, or non-news, seems foreign.
Since I hit 20 weeks, I thought I would post an update for anyone who still follows along. I had thought about a 12 week, 14 week, 16 week and 18 week update, but I guess they just never happened.
Things have been relatively uneventful. When I wrote a few months ago, I had just completed a mild bleeding episode. And that was the last of the blood. For the most part, my toilet paper inspections have yielded nothing out of the ordinary.
In early October my kids came down with slapc.heek, also called Fif.th's Disease. It's a common virus among children where their cheeks look bright bright red and my kids also got rashes on their arms and legs. For those of you who have dogs, it's also parvovirus (I thought, "great, my kids caught a virus that I vaccinate my dog against!"). Anyway, apparently this virus is cause for concern if you're pregnant because it can impact something relating to blood with the baby, potentially requiring a blood transfusion to the fetus. Sounds scary, but didn't seem to be that big a deal because it's common to get when you're a kid and then you're immune. My first blood test indicated that I have never been exposed, so I had a follow up test a few weeks ago which also showed that I hadn't been exposed. Thank goodness. I believe my OB's words were, "I've never had a patient with this condition, and I don't want you to be the first." No kidding.
Running is still great. I usually run 3 1/2 to 4 miles a day, 5-7 days a week, and when I have more time or rest, I'll go 5 or 6, but it's not that often because I can get pretty tired later in the day. I don't know how long I will be able to keep this up for, so I will enjoy it while I can. All my pregnancies have been at different times of the year (December, August, and now April due dates), and I've never been visibly pregnant and running during the cold season, so I don't have any running pants. I've tried some yoga pants, but haven't found anything good. For now my normal running pants are very old and stretched out, so I can still wear them and not care if I ruin them, but my Nike capris (with nice wide waist bands) are getting rather tight. And I'm too cheap to go spend a bunch of money on something I may only wear for two months. Must find cheap yoga pants that can double as running pants while I can still run, or lounge/walking pants when I'm done. Please pass on any advice. :)
Lastly, I had my anatomy scan this morning. The baby was confirmed to be a girl, which is cool but scary (OMG, 3 girls!), but then again, I would be scared with a boy too (they're so squirty!). At my NT scan in September, the doctor got a good shot and predicted girl (70% certainty), so it wasn't a surprise, but it was nice to be confirmed.
The baby's head is measuring small - maybe by about a week, so still within the normal range - but I need to go back in a couple of weeks to make sure that she just has a small head and doesn't have any developmental issues. This pregnancy is keeping me on my toes. I am trying to locate my ultrasound reports from my other children to see where they measured, but I guess the best thing to do is just wait and see. The doctor didn't seem concerned, but just wanted to confirm.
Anyway, that's about it for now. I do want to write at some point about the commercialization of infertility clinics. One clinic has a lot of commercials on the news station that I list to, and I thought, "well, of course, they are a private clinic", but then one morning I turned on the TV to check on the status of a local transit strike and saw that my clinic (which is affiliated with the local university) was sponsoring the news ticker! I guess there's a lot of competition for patients, especially when insurance isn't involved, but it just surprised me since I always considered my time at the clinic to be very private, personal and confidential (not that advertising made any difference in the way they treat you).
Work is beckoning, so I will sign off. I hope all is well with everyone. I do still read, but don't comment as often. That's mostly due to the fact that I've had to increase my sleep!
Wednesday, November 20, 2013
Saturday, September 14, 2013
And then it stopped...for now
It's one day at a time over here...again! The bleeding episode ended as quickly as it started and I am very thankful for that. I took it easy and only went for a walk Wednesday and Thursday, and resumed running yesterday and today. So far there have been no ill effects.
However, I have to say that the bleeding has definitely put us on edge. I will be 11 weeks tomorrow and I have only told two people: one friend who called a couple of weeks ago and asked whether we were still considering another child (crazily, I told the WHOLE story. It's so unlike me, but then again, she's a friend that I've known since first grade, so if there's anyone I can trust, it's someone I've known for 34 years.). The second person was a designer who came in the other day to give us some ideas on our house. We currently are poorly set up for a family of 5, so I thought it was important that he know why our goals are what they are.
I have an appointment with my OB a week from Monday, so maybe I'll feel more comfortable then, or perhaps I will wait until the end of that week when I have my NT scan. I wish I could tell my parents, but it's just not time. For now, I will continue to suck in my stomach whenever I see them.
I just can't get over the idea that it's entirely possible that the baby has died, but my body hasn't realized it yet. So for now, I stay quiet, hope for the best, and try to hold off on moving up my appointment for next Monday!
However, I have to say that the bleeding has definitely put us on edge. I will be 11 weeks tomorrow and I have only told two people: one friend who called a couple of weeks ago and asked whether we were still considering another child (crazily, I told the WHOLE story. It's so unlike me, but then again, she's a friend that I've known since first grade, so if there's anyone I can trust, it's someone I've known for 34 years.). The second person was a designer who came in the other day to give us some ideas on our house. We currently are poorly set up for a family of 5, so I thought it was important that he know why our goals are what they are.
I have an appointment with my OB a week from Monday, so maybe I'll feel more comfortable then, or perhaps I will wait until the end of that week when I have my NT scan. I wish I could tell my parents, but it's just not time. For now, I will continue to suck in my stomach whenever I see them.
I just can't get over the idea that it's entirely possible that the baby has died, but my body hasn't realized it yet. So for now, I stay quiet, hope for the best, and try to hold off on moving up my appointment for next Monday!
Tuesday, September 10, 2013
Updates
I have been meaning to update for quite some time now, but I find myself needing more sleep and falling asleep before I have the chance to turn my computer back on.
Anyway, I had my two 8 week appointments almost two weeks ago. They were both good. The embryo and the sac both measured on track and the heartbeat looked good. At my new OB appointment, my OB did notice a sub-chorionic hematoma and said that I might have some bleeding.
True to her word, I started having some bleeding if you could call it that. I don't even know how to describe it other than a slow leak, maybe? It went away last Wednesday, which was a relief, but it returned for real tonight. I don't have any cramping, so we'll see what happens. I just hope it's the SCH doing it's thing. We'll see what happens, but for now I think exercise is off limits for two weeks. Not having that stress relief may be the hardest part....
My OB also ordered all sorts of tests. I am in the middle of a 24 hour urine sample (yes, it's as gross at it sounds) and I have to do a one hour glucose screening asap (yes, it's early for this!) in addition to the standard first trimester bloodwork. I think she's looking to gather baseline information in case things start to change later in the pregnancy.
I need to turn in my jug-o-pee tomorrow at the lab which is in the same suite as her office, so I might try to see if she can sneak me in for a quick ultrasound or doppler check (can you locate a heartbeat via doppler at 10 1/2 weeks?
Before I got my little surprise a little while ago, I was expecting this update to be a whole lot of nothing. I hope it turns out that this bleeding episode really is a whole lot of nothing.
Anyway, I had my two 8 week appointments almost two weeks ago. They were both good. The embryo and the sac both measured on track and the heartbeat looked good. At my new OB appointment, my OB did notice a sub-chorionic hematoma and said that I might have some bleeding.
True to her word, I started having some bleeding if you could call it that. I don't even know how to describe it other than a slow leak, maybe? It went away last Wednesday, which was a relief, but it returned for real tonight. I don't have any cramping, so we'll see what happens. I just hope it's the SCH doing it's thing. We'll see what happens, but for now I think exercise is off limits for two weeks. Not having that stress relief may be the hardest part....
My OB also ordered all sorts of tests. I am in the middle of a 24 hour urine sample (yes, it's as gross at it sounds) and I have to do a one hour glucose screening asap (yes, it's early for this!) in addition to the standard first trimester bloodwork. I think she's looking to gather baseline information in case things start to change later in the pregnancy.
I need to turn in my jug-o-pee tomorrow at the lab which is in the same suite as her office, so I might try to see if she can sneak me in for a quick ultrasound or doppler check (can you locate a heartbeat via doppler at 10 1/2 weeks?
Before I got my little surprise a little while ago, I was expecting this update to be a whole lot of nothing. I hope it turns out that this bleeding episode really is a whole lot of nothing.
Sunday, August 25, 2013
All Cleared Up
Sorry for the radio silence.... The spotting that I had right after my 6 week ultrasound cleared up within a day. I never called the clinic because I didn't think that a day of spotting was something that I would want to go in for. The other option for advice would have been to wait and see...something I was planning on doing already.
So here I am today assuming that I am 8 weeks pregnant. It was right around this point in my last pregnancy that my embryo died. Thankfully, I have a fair number of symptoms that are lobbying for me to be convinced that this pregnancy is progressing normally. But still...I've been thinking about it a lot, especially since I had been convinced I would have the baby this weekend, even though it was a month before the due date.
So anyway, I have my intended "graduation" appointment with my RE on Wednesday, and then an appointment with my OB on Thursday. I had to do some appointment juggling because I do not want a repeat of last time. If this pregnancy is not meant to be, I want to find out at my RE's office. After all, who wants to have two appointments that will confirm that there is no heartbeat? Not me.
Plus, I need Thursday to include a good strategic conversation to see if there's anything I can do differently to advance this pregnancy to full term. I hope it's not a matter of "let's do more ultrasounds". That's seems so passive, but maybe it's the only path to take? It makes me wonder if an appointment with a perinatologist would have any value.
But I get ahead of myself. I'll work through this after Wednesday. I'd like to do something, but I am not good with coming up with meaningful gifts. Any ideas? Ironically, Wednesday marks four years since my first consultation with my RE. We obviously had a long break between my graduation with mini-Munchkin and the beginning of this journey for #3, but still, it's been a long time. And the battle for #3 has certainly required confidence in the plan and trust in my doctor. I respect her so much and have valued her advice and the fact that she was always able to back everything up with data.
I will miss her, but am not sad to be moving on!
So here I am today assuming that I am 8 weeks pregnant. It was right around this point in my last pregnancy that my embryo died. Thankfully, I have a fair number of symptoms that are lobbying for me to be convinced that this pregnancy is progressing normally. But still...I've been thinking about it a lot, especially since I had been convinced I would have the baby this weekend, even though it was a month before the due date.
So anyway, I have my intended "graduation" appointment with my RE on Wednesday, and then an appointment with my OB on Thursday. I had to do some appointment juggling because I do not want a repeat of last time. If this pregnancy is not meant to be, I want to find out at my RE's office. After all, who wants to have two appointments that will confirm that there is no heartbeat? Not me.
Plus, I need Thursday to include a good strategic conversation to see if there's anything I can do differently to advance this pregnancy to full term. I hope it's not a matter of "let's do more ultrasounds". That's seems so passive, but maybe it's the only path to take? It makes me wonder if an appointment with a perinatologist would have any value.
But I get ahead of myself. I'll work through this after Wednesday. I'd like to do something, but I am not good with coming up with meaningful gifts. Any ideas? Ironically, Wednesday marks four years since my first consultation with my RE. We obviously had a long break between my graduation with mini-Munchkin and the beginning of this journey for #3, but still, it's been a long time. And the battle for #3 has certainly required confidence in the plan and trust in my doctor. I respect her so much and have valued her advice and the fact that she was always able to back everything up with data.
I will miss her, but am not sad to be moving on!
Friday, August 16, 2013
Ups and Downs
It's never easy, is it?
My ultrasound yesterday was great. The embryo had a nice strong heartbeat and measured right on target at 6 week 4 days. The sac size was normal, even ahead by a few days. My RE commented that this looked straightforward and appeared to be a much healthier pregnancy than the last. Good news all around. What a relief!
Then this morning when I got back from my run, there was blood on my panty liner. Not bright red, but not super old looking brown either. It's not a lot, but I found more blood up close to my cervix when I inserted the AM progesterone suppository. UGH.
I know that bleeding in early pregnancy can mean nothing, or it can mean something. Regardless, it's concerning. I just checked my logs from my first two pregnancies and I had spotting during my 8th week on both of them. This is a bit earlier, but maybe this is just something that my body does? Still, I don't consider this encouraging. Who knows. I'll take it easy for a couple of days and see what happens. Hopefully it will stop. And hopefully I will be able to refrain from visiting my good friend dr. google....
My ultrasound yesterday was great. The embryo had a nice strong heartbeat and measured right on target at 6 week 4 days. The sac size was normal, even ahead by a few days. My RE commented that this looked straightforward and appeared to be a much healthier pregnancy than the last. Good news all around. What a relief!
Then this morning when I got back from my run, there was blood on my panty liner. Not bright red, but not super old looking brown either. It's not a lot, but I found more blood up close to my cervix when I inserted the AM progesterone suppository. UGH.
I know that bleeding in early pregnancy can mean nothing, or it can mean something. Regardless, it's concerning. I just checked my logs from my first two pregnancies and I had spotting during my 8th week on both of them. This is a bit earlier, but maybe this is just something that my body does? Still, I don't consider this encouraging. Who knows. I'll take it easy for a couple of days and see what happens. Hopefully it will stop. And hopefully I will be able to refrain from visiting my good friend dr. google....
Tuesday, August 13, 2013
Confidence
A woman confident in her pregnancy feels a cramp and knows her body is adjusting for the new life inside it.
An infertile confident in her pregnancy feels a gush and curses her progesterone supplement.
A woman confident in her pregnancy lets herself plan for the next nine months and beyond.
A woman confident in her pregnancy lacks symptoms and considers herself lucky.
A woman confident in her pregnancy looks forward to her OB appointments.
A pregnant woman fearful of the worst feels a cramp and wonders whether she's starting to miscarry.
A pregnant woman fearful of the worst feels a gush and rushes to the bathroom to see how bright the blood is.
A pregnant woman fearful of the worst chides herself for talking with her husband about the future as if the take home baby is going to become a reality.
A pregnant woman fearful of the worst has no symptoms and assumes her baby has died.
A pregnant woman fearful of the worst spends way too much time inspecting toilet paper for signs of blood
A pregnant woman fearful of the worst s terrified of her OB appointments.
Things have been quiet here as I progress through the limbo of very early pregnancy. I want to be the same confident person that I was in January and early February, the one who had no qualms about planning for the future, both near and far. And in many ways, I do have confidence. My symptoms are stronger than last time. I feel pregnant. I want to plan. But on the other hand, in some ways it feels like deja vu. We are having many of the same conversations that we had 6+ months ago that turned out to moot. (What kind of a car will we need to support our larger family? Should we try to take a family vacation before or after the baby is born?) These are healthy conversations to have, but I also feel the need to protect myself. After all, there are no guarantees.
Thankfully, I am staying somewhere in the middle of the spectrum. I am not blissful, naive, or unaware of the vulnerability of these first few weeks, but I am also not paralyzed by the fear of the worst. I hope my appointment on Thursday brings me no new data that should cause me to worry. I will be 6 weeks 4 days, which is the same point I was when I went for my first ultrasound in my last two pregnancies. At least we will have two data points for comparison.
An infertile confident in her pregnancy feels a gush and curses her progesterone supplement.
A woman confident in her pregnancy lets herself plan for the next nine months and beyond.
A woman confident in her pregnancy lacks symptoms and considers herself lucky.
A woman confident in her pregnancy looks forward to her OB appointments.
A pregnant woman fearful of the worst feels a cramp and wonders whether she's starting to miscarry.
A pregnant woman fearful of the worst feels a gush and rushes to the bathroom to see how bright the blood is.
A pregnant woman fearful of the worst chides herself for talking with her husband about the future as if the take home baby is going to become a reality.
A pregnant woman fearful of the worst has no symptoms and assumes her baby has died.
A pregnant woman fearful of the worst spends way too much time inspecting toilet paper for signs of blood
A pregnant woman fearful of the worst s terrified of her OB appointments.
Things have been quiet here as I progress through the limbo of very early pregnancy. I want to be the same confident person that I was in January and early February, the one who had no qualms about planning for the future, both near and far. And in many ways, I do have confidence. My symptoms are stronger than last time. I feel pregnant. I want to plan. But on the other hand, in some ways it feels like deja vu. We are having many of the same conversations that we had 6+ months ago that turned out to moot. (What kind of a car will we need to support our larger family? Should we try to take a family vacation before or after the baby is born?) These are healthy conversations to have, but I also feel the need to protect myself. After all, there are no guarantees.
Thankfully, I am staying somewhere in the middle of the spectrum. I am not blissful, naive, or unaware of the vulnerability of these first few weeks, but I am also not paralyzed by the fear of the worst. I hope my appointment on Thursday brings me no new data that should cause me to worry. I will be 6 weeks 4 days, which is the same point I was when I went for my first ultrasound in my last two pregnancies. At least we will have two data points for comparison.
Sunday, August 4, 2013
Beta #2
We're back safely from our vacation (it was fabulous!) and have a few days of work before we head up to Lake Tahoe for a long weekend with my husband's family. I can't really afford the time off, so I'll work a half day Thursday and all day Friday, but will at least be able to enjoy the family time in the evenings, and Saturday.
As planned, I went back to the lab Thursday afternoon for Beta #2. It came back at 2100. Nice! I will save my comments on my fear of twins for another day.
My ultrasound is currently scheduled for the 15th. I will obviously be looking forward to that day to find out what's going on. When I was pregnant back in January, everything looked good, but my RE commented that the sac was on the low end of normal...nothing to be concerned about just yet, but something to watch. This time around it won't be good enough to see a heartbeat; I will be paying close attention to the measurements as well.
Until then, I am not going to worry. Or at least I'm going to try. I know there's really nothing I can do, so I'm going to do my best to be normal. Of course I'm will wondering whether there's anything that makes an IVF pregnancy more "fragile" than a spontaneous one, but I'm going to assume the answer is no and carry on with my current exercise schedule. It keeps any nausea at bay so it's kind of critical.
As planned, I went back to the lab Thursday afternoon for Beta #2. It came back at 2100. Nice! I will save my comments on my fear of twins for another day.
My ultrasound is currently scheduled for the 15th. I will obviously be looking forward to that day to find out what's going on. When I was pregnant back in January, everything looked good, but my RE commented that the sac was on the low end of normal...nothing to be concerned about just yet, but something to watch. This time around it won't be good enough to see a heartbeat; I will be paying close attention to the measurements as well.
Until then, I am not going to worry. Or at least I'm going to try. I know there's really nothing I can do, so I'm going to do my best to be normal. Of course I'm will wondering whether there's anything that makes an IVF pregnancy more "fragile" than a spontaneous one, but I'm going to assume the answer is no and carry on with my current exercise schedule. It keeps any nausea at bay so it's kind of critical.
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)
