Here I Am

Hi, my name is Shelley...and I am infertile. 

There.  I said it.

I have been thinking about starting this blog for a long time, but I kept hoping that I wouldn't need it. 

I am 36 years old and have an almost 2 year old daughter.  It took 17 months of irregular cycles to conceive, but I was lucky in that I got pregnant my first month on Clomid.  I nursed Munchkin for a year and the day after I stopped, I got my first post-baby period. 

My cycles stayed irregular, and I knew that I would need help again, but hoped all I needed was a prescription or two of Clo.mid and I would be on my way.  I was training for a triathlon in early May, so I called the doctor in April to get a prescription.  May came and went, and so did June, July and August with no luck.  My OB was going on maternity leave at the end of August and we decided it was a good time for me to switch over to an RE. 

I had an initial meeting with the RE at the end of August.  Her thought was that maybe I have a hypothalamic disorder and we decided that a good next step was to do a 5th cycle with Clo.mid, but to add IUI to increase our chances.  In between the meeting and my next period, I decided I wanted to step up our chances even more and do an injectable cycle.  The RE was amenable to this and she put me on Foll.istim.  I turned out to be a fast responder and even with lowered dosage after my first check, I had 4-5 follicles.  Unfortunately, not only did I not get pregnant, I also ended up with 5 cysts and a cancelled cycle.

I am currently on CD11 and am privately hoping that somehow I will be able to ovulate on my own this month (yeah, right!), but also get pregnant so that I don't have to postpone or cancel my unfortunately timed vacation to Hawaii next month (more on that later).

I want to add to our family, and it's getting difficult to keep a positive attitude with failure month after month and friends who can get pregnant two days after they decide it's time to have a baby.  Sigh.